I am ugly. I am stupid. I am not worth love or friendship.
Did you just cringe? Did you want to tell me that I’m wrong? Did you think, “How could she possibly believe that?” When you say hurtful things about yourself, that is how I feel.
I have had bad relationships, I have had bad luck with boys, misunderstandings and disappointments with friends, and all-around seasons of unhappiness. I get it. Sometimes these things happen. But remember, this is not forever. And also remember, you deserve better.
If someone doesn’t want you when you’re in a rough patch, that is their character flaw, not yours. No one is too much to “handle” and no one should make you feel that way.
Someone out there will love you, and support you and will not be able to get enough of you. Of course, this is how I feel about you, but in the interest of talking about romance, I want to assure you someone outside of your family will love you this way, like they are your family. But you can’t find this person until you believe that about yourself. If you are underselling yourself, you won’t be looking for the best. You will look for whatever you think you deserve. Another person can’t fill in the hole that you’ve dug.
The right person will:
- Love the people who love you. They will rejoice when they see you surrounded by loved ones because it will be like seeing you in a happy, love bubble. (P.s. this is also how your mom feels about you).
- They will celebrate you and be happiest when you do the things you love, instead of trying to keep you from it.
- They will want what’s best for you, and they will trust you to know what that is.
- They will not boss you around.
- They will listen to you.
Also remember that for most of your life, romance will not be the most important thing or even the thing that will take up most of your thoughts. Romance is fun and exciting, but it’s such a small part of living, and it’s not something you can force. Love yourself and others well, and live large because as someone who loves you, I want to see you happy and whole.